Cause love's such an old-fashioned word

I am Jack's chest cold.

My mom worries me to no end these days. Everytime I meet her she starts bawling her eyes out about how negligent I am in my filial duties. She thinks Nads disrepects her and is avoiding her (the latter is true). Her closest friends (my godmother amoung them) have abandoned her... though she claims that she does not want to contact them. She feels slighted, and I can't tell if it's imagined or not. All I can tell is that I cannot forgive them for not being kind to her, even if they are right to do so. If they abandon my mother then they will have nothing to do with me, either. Many days I get scared when the phone rings. I fear it is someone telling me she has killed herself. I imagine I would be shocked, cry from a mix of grief and relief, and feel guilty the rest of my life. Nads won't help me.

On to happier news, my Christmas loot from the gang include: Civ IV SE (from Chris), Half-Life 2 and a t-shirt (from Richard), a really cool electronic top (from Linda), and "The Wind-up Bird Chronicle" (from Mark). Civ IV is the best game ever and the top is awesome, and I'm pretty sure I'll like Half-Life 2 and the book even though I have yet to experience them. As I was explaining to my co-worker, Christmas is now pretty much over for me, as far as gifts go. I'll get more gifts from my in-laws, but the really cool gifts that I know I'll love come from the gang. In-laws get you the necessities like sweaters and other clothing, which is good too, but it's hard to be excited about it. I also feel really terrible that Chris spent so much on my gift and I only got him one Doctor Who DVD... had I but known beforehand! Also it was a bit awkward that Richard and I together got Mark a Civ IV SE but Chris seemed to find it cheaply at Best Buy. I mean, it's not definitely not his fault and I am glad he is in such a spirit of giving, and I certainly don't mind scoring Civ IV SE, but I wish I had more money to reciprocate the kindness.

In either case, hopefully I can repay him with a contract opportunity at work. The prospect of working with a close friend worries me a little bit, but I'm excited. Fun times at work!