We rode on horses made of sticks

There is something about being in a funk that is... compounding. The people you are cheering for lose, you start losing every game you play, and the words I can't loom so near. Something about it is also appealing though, some part of me just wishes the streak would never end. Maybe then I'd have an excuse to quit, or I'd be such a tragic character that people may shower me with attention.
Being a manager is a tough gig, unless you're not human. I sympathize with my lackeys and I hate to pressure them and I'd rather foster them instead of criticising. Having to talk to them about disciplinary action is part of what I signed up for, though. I want them to succeed.

Phenomenal Cosmic Power!

I do not like deciding people's futures. I'm feel like that's what I'm doing when I choose who I'm going to interview, and who's going to get the job. I feel like that when I have to evaluate my new employees at the end of their probation.

I'm not on the Pro Tour (yet). We are assembling a team for PTQ Atlanta, though!

I'm really losing faith in my Magic abilities, though. I've sucked at the Sealed decks that we have had within the gang. It's not pretty... I'm branded before the slaughter.

Nads wants a new career. I hope she finds it. She was really angry at me for the sleepover at Mark's on Friday, which now even she realizes is pretty crazy.

I discovered Mai Thai's on Saturday Morning. What a great sipping drink!

The Simpsons' new Treehouse of Horror sucked so bad I wanted to cry. Where are the Simpsons that made me laugh until I hurt?

Should I commit or should I go?

I declare today... as D&D-Day! Hakan is going to blow some minds tonight. Possibly sell his dreams to some strange merchant. Tasty.

I had some dream last night. My scalp had many great big pimples on it, and I for a moment thought that I shouldn't have short hair with skin like that, and then I thought, "whatever". And this bee wouldn't leave me alone and I was petrified. It as crawling all over me and I cowered on the ground with my hands on the back of my head until it went away. I don't remember it going away. Nads said I had a disturbed sleep all night and she woke me multiple times. She did not sleep well either, apparently.

I can't describe how much I hate seeing that messages are waiting on my phone when I come into work. Potentially the worst things happen after you're gone or before you come in. I dread checking those messages. Today it was okay though.. just Elwell calling in sick.

She left her head for a boy in a magazine

No news of Leo. There should be some kind of zine for lost or missing pets.

Yesterday I bought Sims 2. I played it for a bit. It's absolutely hilarious and amazing. But of course, Nads was controlling most of the action (back seat player!) and forced me to recreate us. It's cool how you can start off with a relationship now, so of course we're married. And of course, I have the Knowledge aspirations while she has family. We did a pretty decent job of recreating ourselves, too. Our house is kinda shabby, and some guy in a jogging suit totally robbed our Simoleons from our money tree! Man, if that game had violence I would've pushed it to an M-Rating right there. There are a billion improvements so I suggest you go get it right now if you're into that kind of thing.

Last night I also submitted my code for the Google Code Jam. Today the System testing crashed my 1000 point question though. How lame. I bet it was because it was a little inefficient and went over 8 seconds rather than it being wrong. It's so right. =P It's nice to see only 10 people passed the system test for that one though. Too bad I did so poorly on the easier question (it survived the system test though). I suck.

I'm going to a Jays game tonight. They suck, too. Man, I'm just surrounded by suck. My videocard sucks.

We're now fully in gear to hire people. I called some guy who left a resume with another department before but he didn't respond. I'm going to be the coolest interviewer ever. Definitely on the top of my question list:

What is your favourite movie?
What is your favourite book?
What was the most interesting project you've ever worked on and why did it interest you?

Two of the internals applied, and they are both friends with Elwell, who was hired here in June. Coincidence? It's a little worrisome. And of course silly Keith didn't apply. He still feels obligated to stay on his team, while someone else from his own team is applying! What a world. I'm still mourning that I'm not allowed to hire Ellen.

I kick in like a turbo booster

I broke down and jumped on another bandwagon. My identity becomes clearer the more I blur it within someone else's. I signed up for GMail. It looks decent.. the idea of starred messages is intriguing, and it is something that Rogers Yahoo! Mail does not have.

I like to experiment on people. Ever since I was a kid... I think most people have done it... stop calling someone just to see how long it'd take them to notice. I read in Microserfs that most people are too involved in their own lives to notice or think about another person's. I think this journal may help with that.

I am so low on empathy, and the main computer system will be down for an hour! The entire office is idle. Our busy bonus is draining with every second...

I wonder how this whole roleplaying thing is going to pan out. Richard still hasn't said a word about it. There are all these secret negotiations going on that I'm not party to. Maybe I shouldn't be party to. I'm sure Linda thinks I'm unworthy to handle anything from now on.

The Sims 2 was reviewed on GameSpot! How hot.. that means it'll be out soon... mmmmm. Ooh, and I'm almost down NWN: Hordes of the Underdark. What a great expansion. Much better than the Shadows of Undrentide even though that had some interesting elements. And I've got all the sexy ladies in my party.

You can be my everything

I just moved into my new office. It's pretty sweet. It's kind of weird watching people walk by your office all the time, though. Many people are congratulating me... some that haven't. It kind of feels like being a Prom Queen. More like a Prom King... and I'm not saying that because of the gender, but rather being a Prom King seems to matter a lot less to the Prom King than being Prom Queen does to the Prom Queen, and in that respect I'm more like the Prom King. Still, some people have been really encouraging and it's nice.

Last night I watched Canada wipe the floor with Slovakia in the World Cup. I'm telling you, when Czech Slovakia divided into two countries Slovakia got the short end of the hockey stick. I can just imagine the draft when the country sundered:

Czech Republic: "We'll take Jagr."
Slovakia: "We'll take... Lasak."

Linda and Mark got into more arguments than usual. They get so intense about it in the moment but it's usually alright a little later. It was over a couple of very silly things: Whether what someone estimated to be the square miles required by landfill 1 thousand years from now is viable, and whether the term turtling means blocking or crouching. For the most part I stayed out of it, but it seems to me that Linda doesn't listen accurately. And she feels patronized a lot. Or maybe she just uses that as a weapon to make Mark feel bad. After the second fight broke out we played Tekken in silence.

Back on yesterday's theory about trying to make all of our perspectives throughout time converge: What if desire is the result of something even greater than that? What if desire comes from trying to converge all our conscious and subconscious through parallel dimensions? (ie, my desire or discontent is because I can't reconcile my consciousness with an alternate dimension me). Mind-blowing.

Licorice whips

Today we only had only a half day of work. Hurrah! Almost everyone was either away or working from home anyway. A group of employees were going out for drinks right after work, but they had not invited me. They invited Reg though, which is the usual. Aishah caught me as I was leaving work and invited me, but I didn't feel right going since I wasn't originally invited. Is that pride? I guess it is.

I have to wait until Wednesday to officially take over my office and move into the Software Development Manager position. I hope to get some of that Dale Carnegie Leadership training soon.

I don't think I can help but be happy. Sometimes, I'm momentarily sad, like when Nadine and I fight about something, but I'm still the happiest person I know. Nads is a huge part of that, of course, but I sometimes wonder if I could be happy if she wasn't around. And if I couldn't, would I have been too harsh in dealing with people who are desperate for companionship? I'm not sure. I have a cornucopia of love to give, and not having an outlet might upset me more than a little. Anyway, sometimes I think about things, and think about whether I should be upset by them or not, or why I'm not upset about things. Maybe I'm inhuman. A machine. A simple object. Zeroes and Ones.

I think I'm growing bored of Warcraft. Time to catch up on that stack of games that I've been wanting to play.

Today my mom, Nads, and I celebrated Keith's birthday at the Mongolian Grill. He ate soooo much. I ate an excessive amount as well, and grew tired immediately. I wonder what kind of person would fall in love with Keith, and if there is such a person out there. There are certain aspects of his personality that are so unattractive, that might belong to a supporting alien in a movie. The supporting role would mean that he is totally uninterested in love and focused on other goals, so that the audience will never question his outrageous characteristics that would make him unbelievable or unlovable. But he is such a nice guy. A product of rural New Brunswick.

At this restaurant, I received a lesson from my waiter who nearly took my plate when I wasn't done. He told me to "eat, don't talk". He walked away before I could tell him to fuck off. Jackass.

I think I'm in the mood for a little lyric:

Today, I found god
Toosday, sigh frowned pod
Tuesday, my crowned cod