there's nobody around for miles

The nature of internet journals, personal webpages, and the like are intriguing to me. I guess I'm metablogging this in some way, but I'm sure it's been done a few million times already. Society has gotten to the point where our validation comes from these utilities.

It is a natural and effective progression in the evolution of human needs. We need to be validated, and we need people to be witnesses to our lives in order for that to happen. Computers has made that relation more efficient. No longer are those two acts coupled tightly and inseperable. They have provided a layer in between the need and the witness. Now, I can post something and feel validated, while someone may or may not witness it at their own convenience. None of this "getting together" stuff.

For example, Linda uses her journal to convey her cleverness to validate her identity. Acceptable. People read it, they respond, they care - whatever, but it has nothing to do with how clever she feels when logging her thoughts. Ellen's new website (which is what triggered this line of thought) is great. I like reading about her in a format that is convenient to me. It carries tons of personal facts that encapsulate her identity and existence. Yay for her. I use this blog as a way to force myself to write, even though sometimes I wish someone would read it, so that my validation would be authentic.

Sometimes, like this post here, I catch myself writing to a non-existent audience. Sometimes I catch myself bringing up this blog to someone - just a casual throw into a conversation, but no one asks to read it. It's just as well, for they may get bored quickly.

It hurts me so to see you go 'round with someone new

There is something about Court shows that are just sick. Having spent a couple of weekdays at home, and with Nads subjecting me to them, I realize why I hate them so much: the courtroom is a place where the media should not go. I don't care that it is only small claims court. The principle is appalling. Consider someone who is writing in a private journal, and the same person who writes in a private journal on national TV, where every individual in the country can see what that person is writing. The entries, I hypothesize, would not be the same. No one should have to sit in court and have to wonder whether the judge is saying things or acting a certain way because s/he has a national audience.

On to brighter news, I really scored with the gang! Mark got me this hot World Series of Poker set with amazing quality chips. I'm right now trying to do the chip shuffle that the Pros always do, but I'm having some difficulty. Does anyone have any tips? Linda got me this high quality Puma made Maple Leafs touque! Now I can look dorky in style. And Richard gave me this ultimate edition Cassern DVD. I can't wait to see it.. it looks pretty awesome. Richard and Jen also gave Nads and I a napkin holder and napkin pack. Pretty handy.. maybe they noticed that we seriously lacked napkins last time they were over? Hmm...

This only adds to my hosting anxiety. I try to be a good host whenever people come over, but I can't help but feel that they're bored or whatever. I try desperately to entertain, but I'm pretty horrible at it. I also attempt not to feel hurt when people leave early, but people like Ellen and Sabrina always do. And they usually leave to go somewhere else. I realize that people have things to do... I guess I'm just used to the gang because we always hang out until the witching hours.

What did the bartender say to the roof when it ordered a beer?

For you, it's on the house.

I'm only 47% Libra. I'm a terrible Libra. I'm a socially defunct, inactive Libra. Some things in the quiz I couldn't quite answer, like "You consider yourself attractive and like to be around attractive people". I mean, I have to answer false because the first half is false. But the second half is true. I should try all the signs and see what sign I should be.... results later. [Results are in!: 53% Scorpio (Linda), 67% Sagittarius (Nads), 47% Capricorn (Richard), 67% Aquarius (Ellen), 67% Pisces, 40% Aries, 27% Taurus, 53% Gemini (Mom), 53% Cancer (Mark), 47% Leo, 67% Virgo (Keith). I guess it figures that I'm more like almost everyone else than myself.]

I feel quite terrible for Richard. Originally, Linda, Mark, and I decided to go to the Team Limited event at Grand Prix Chicago. We were going to be Team Powerpuff, and our hair colours each matched one of the girls made from Sugar and Spice, and everything nice. But then Linda for some reason decides she sucks at Magic and decides to drop out from our team, and so we have Richard in her place. And of course he feels like a replacement or a sub. I'm usually the one left out... I should be. This feels worse than if I were the one left out. I can't help but think part of Linda's motive for dropping out is because she knows Richard wants to be part of the team. But what kind of team name will we have now? I really think Linda is really good under tournament conditions, though, and she has proven that she is better than all of us under those conditions. She's also decided she wants to become a judge... we need a montage of her learning Magic rules.

I am going to test all my diplomacy skills in the world tonight. Nads has previously mandated that Linda not be allowed in our home. I'm going to try to change that, because it's making my life hell. I've never let on how difficult it is, but I hate having to worry if, someday, Mark is coming over to my house and he brings Linda along. Or how I have to avoid the subject of why we can't play Magic at my house. It makes me sad that I can love two people so much and they can't get along. What's worse for me is that Linda is more tolerant than Nads is being, and even Linda wouldn't call herself a tolerant person. Plus, I have to hide this unreasonable stipulation from the gang so that they will not look poorly on Nads. You can't repair that kind of PR, and it will make my social life even harder.

I want them spellbound, begging on their knees

So, here I am, guilty of not following through on my own initiative. I can't believe I can't even upkeep a journal... something is seriously wrong with me.

I had a voluptuous weekend. On Saturday we celebrated Linda's birthday. We started the day at Johnny's Burgers (a delicious joint for anyone in Toronto), then headed to Putting Edge glow-in-the-dark mini-golfing (where I reigned supreme!), rediscovered the joys of Skee-Ball at Dave and Buster's (all tickets went to Linda so that she could buy a bunch of girl stuff), took her to her favourite restaurant, and then headed back to Mark's for some hardcore drinking, Magic (can M:TG be hardcore?), and Tekken.

I really sucked at Tekken.

We decided we would all come up with Extended Mono Colour decks and each play a different colour and can play a 5p format that way. I was left with Red or Blue and I'm going with Red. Goblins are the obvious choice, or maybe I can do a Chance Encounters deck. Since we're agreeing to disallow artifacts and legendary land, I think my Drooling Ogres will kick some ass.

We all gave her pretty stellar presents. Mark gave her a foil Yosei, the Morning Star (he traded for mine), a Two Headed Dragon, Ryusei, the Falling Star, and a Plateau. Richard gave her a Spirited Away DVD. I gave her Sims 2, which means we will never see her again. Ever. I also gave her this Monster Manual that I made for her a while back, but I never gave to her. I couldn't remember why, but I remembered after giving it to her. I was afraid she'd just find it lame or stupid, and I think that's what she thought of it. I thought it was pretty good...

Richard and I are talking a little more now... we're sort of united by Magic. Richard and Linda seem to be getting along, bonding over Naruto. Linda claims that all the girls in Naruto are useless in the first 50 episodes, and that spawned an entire day of girls suck hilarity.

A couple of weeks ago was my birthday celebration with the gang and that was great too. We drank and did some hardcore Magic. They all pitched in to get me an entire box - 36 packs - of Kamigawa goodness. It's turning out to be my favourite set so far, so I'm really glad. That's when I opened a foil Yosei, the Morning Star. We did a sealed tourney with those packs, and Mark pretty much won. Nads got me Jesus Christ Superstar on DVD even though I was saving up my present money to get a new video card. Sabrina got me the last book in the Dark Tower series in the ever stylish hardcover. Ellen gave me an Old Navy sweatshirt.. it's comfy.

The week following that I had a good showing at the Sealed tourney on Sunday at 401. I finished 3-4 and got $5 credit. Of course, I opened another Yosei.

She left her head for a boy in a magazine

No news of Leo. There should be some kind of zine for lost or missing pets.

Yesterday I bought Sims 2. I played it for a bit. It's absolutely hilarious and amazing. But of course, Nads was controlling most of the action (back seat player!) and forced me to recreate us. It's cool how you can start off with a relationship now, so of course we're married. And of course, I have the Knowledge aspirations while she has family. We did a pretty decent job of recreating ourselves, too. Our house is kinda shabby, and some guy in a jogging suit totally robbed our Simoleons from our money tree! Man, if that game had violence I would've pushed it to an M-Rating right there. There are a billion improvements so I suggest you go get it right now if you're into that kind of thing.

Last night I also submitted my code for the Google Code Jam. Today the System testing crashed my 1000 point question though. How lame. I bet it was because it was a little inefficient and went over 8 seconds rather than it being wrong. It's so right. =P It's nice to see only 10 people passed the system test for that one though. Too bad I did so poorly on the easier question (it survived the system test though). I suck.

I'm going to a Jays game tonight. They suck, too. Man, I'm just surrounded by suck. My videocard sucks.

We're now fully in gear to hire people. I called some guy who left a resume with another department before but he didn't respond. I'm going to be the coolest interviewer ever. Definitely on the top of my question list:

What is your favourite movie?
What is your favourite book?
What was the most interesting project you've ever worked on and why did it interest you?

Two of the internals applied, and they are both friends with Elwell, who was hired here in June. Coincidence? It's a little worrisome. And of course silly Keith didn't apply. He still feels obligated to stay on his team, while someone else from his own team is applying! What a world. I'm still mourning that I'm not allowed to hire Ellen.

I'm just a man whose intentions are good

Oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood

I realize that all my posts are pretty self-indulgent and whiny so far, so I'm going to force myself to journalize at least one good point about everyone I can think of.

Nadine: Loyal. Determined.

Richard: Charismatic. Fun.

Linda: Good values. Radical.

Mark: Intelligent. Nice.

Keith: Loyal. Nice.

Ellen: Organized. Respectful daughter.

Sabrina: Initiatative(?)

Paul: Strong. Logical

Marc: Generous.

Jen: Nice. Pragmatic.